When I Finally Saw the Sea​.​.​.

by KNBE

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about

A swan song for love gone wrong.

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released July 15, 2012

All songs written, performed, recorded, engineered, mixed and produced - however poorly - by Eric Exley

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KNBE Long Beach, California

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Track Name: On Hiatus
don't say it's over for good
let's go on hiatus
the reunion tour will be incredible
don't say we're calling it quits,
just pressing "pause" for a while
we will come back in such style
no one will know what hit them

i know what you want to say
so just come out and say it
but you still seem so afraid
cause you know how much i'll hate it
i'm not the last, just the first
as if that were some comfort
i'm not the best, not the worst;
mediocre compliments

though you won't call back
i still wish you would
though you won't come back
i still wish you could

i begged 'til my mouth ran dry
as pity crept through your eyes
you always wished i would try
but not so hard
you wished you felt it inside:
a love and joy you can't hide
but you could barely blink an eye

i fell flat like a bad joke
like a clown on a tightrope
like a stick caught in the spoke
like a prayer with no hope...

i fell flat like a bad joke
like i’m trying to hold this note
like a stick caught in the spoke
like a prayer with no hope...
Track Name: Ghosts
I've seen that everywhere I want to be is right next to you
I've seen that every stranger on the street looks just like you
But they're just ghosts

Some say "forget her"
But I wrote you this letter
A masterpiece in pen and ink
I tried it twice
But it wasn't quite right
Third time is the charm, wouldn't you agree?

With each passing day
I get further away
From the hope you'll have me back
It's too soon to say
If you still love me that way
So I wait and I pray that this spark still attracts

i see the fingers pointing my way
i can't see your lips, but i hear what they say
i know the answer before you begin
i brought you here, then left you again
you might recall everything that we lost
the fire we started just by counting the cost
if i had the chance, i would take it again
if i had the chance....
Track Name: The Same Things
The same things
I always hated
Are the ones I miss the most
Now that we've separated
Like how I
Hated going outside
But I'd die for the chance to stare at the stars
With you tonight

The same things
I took for granted
Are the ones that I see now
Had me most enchanted
Like the way you
Sang with the radio
Off-key and off-tempo
But honest and true

Where there's a will, there's a way
But there's no way to change your will
If I knew hypnotist tricks
I'd put you under such a spell
But that's no way to find love
Only a sure way to kill
I did the best I knew how
You still bid me farewell

I miss the way you sang with the radio
I see the stars and remember what I used to know
I took for granted all the things that made you who you are
But I missed my chance to make it right, now I watch the sky alone
Track Name: A Wish for Wings that Work
Could it be more cliche
Than to call you again
And act like it was an
Absent-minded accident
But then take those moments
To make all my amends?
Could I fix my mistakes
Without admitting them?

I'm sorry that I cannot claim success in anything
I'm trying but I can't complain, cause that won't change a thing
And it stings the life right out of me

Could I be so cliche
That I'd try it again?

(cause you know)
All I want is to end up next to you
You would be my boo, I would be your booze
We'd be lovers like no one's ever been
We'd beat all the odds and then laugh at them

I wished for wings to fly me to you
But when I arrived, you'd flown the coop
I waited for calls that never came
I'd love you if I could remember your name...
Track Name: Books on Tape on Fire
I would kiss every inch
Of your wound if I could find it
I would pause to wrap it in gauze
If you didn't work so hard to hide it
Cause it's not like you're alone
When you bleed, I too see red
But the bandages I have
Don't seem to stick inside your head

I'm no doctor, I've got no MDs
Just these burns of the third degree

I would spend every cent
If I had to buy you pride
But you inherited a fortune
Though you bury it inside
Keep along with the rest
Though you know you shelter better
Keep your song in your chest
It will guard against the weather

I'm no saint, I've got no rosaries
Just these sins that sigh and singe a tune
Of hopeful melody

Will you sing with me?
Track Name: Fell In Love With a Ghost
i'm in love with a ghost
she told me that girl don't exist anymore,
the one i knew before
when i moved out to the coast
i dreamed about her every night
but that could not keep her alive

I remember the last time, baby
We stayed up all night, waiting
For the sun to rise
And our fears to die
But there are some things the sun can't cure...

i'm in love with a host
a collection of memories
from back when you believed
it's hard to say what i miss most
i didn't have a favorite piece
you were altogether stunning

I remember the last time, baby
We stayed up all night, waiting
For the sun to rise
And our fears to die
But there are some things the sun can't cure...

Like my penchant for going out of my way
to make you say the things you don't want to say
you want to protect me, but i need you to break my heart...

I'm in love with a ghost
Fell in love with a ghost
I'm in love with a ghost
Fell in love with a ghost
And the next sunrise
Will dry my eyes for good...
Track Name: Worst Enemy
i don't want to be
drowning under this misery
i can't find a thing, no reason i can see
to not desire you, or wish that you desired me

except the obvious
when you told me to my face there's just no love

i must have missed something
but i miss everything
living a thousand miles away
chasing down a dream
i could not take this chance
could not have made this leap
without your love
but now it's what i'm giving up?
i swear i did not see that coming

i don't have a plan
you are my only example
of getting over us; but i remember everything
and you seem to cope by disassociating

"come in, come in, make yourself at home
you know, you know this place like your own
now sit down, sit down, pour out your whole heart
so i can, i can refuse every part..."

how could i hope, in just a matter of minutes
to change your whole mind, from rejection to acceptance?
i love your independence, your commitment to decisions
but tonight that disposition is my worst enemy

"you may recall, i'm not extreme
i say exactly what i mean"
i know i'm not the only one
to ever fall in and fail out of love
Track Name: In Love With Someone Else
it's a silent, scary thing
to fly into the dark
on a prayer and a wing
beneath a thundercloud

i'm in love with you, but i don't know what to do
i'm in love with you, and you don't have a clue
i'm in love with you, but something tells me you'll soon have someone new
he won't hurt you in the ways that i hurt

if the snow's a metaphor
it was falling long before
i arrived at your door
to hear you say you don't love me anymore

you're in love with someone else, though you don't know who
you're in love with someone else, you will meet him soon
you're in love with someone else, he'll make you happy, make you swoon
he won't wait to speak up, like I did with you
he'll say everything right when he needs to

and it don't matter if you're already looking ahead
you just know you can't look back, too much hurt, too much regret
the look you gave was terrible, one i hoped to never see
and all of my hopes withered within me

it makes no difference now
to voice these thoughts aloud
cause all my time ran out
and now you have no doubts

you're in love with someone else, though you don't know who
you're in love with someone else, you will meet him soon
you're in love with someone else, he'll make you happy, make you swoon
he'll make none of the mistakes i made with you
he'll be everything i tried to be for you
he'll be everything i could not be for you
Track Name: Taylor Swift
you asked me not to love you
but i don't know how not to
you told me that you cared
but the love was just not there
it's all so vivid to me
but to you, just fading memories
a different life you don't still lead
a different life, that you don't need

i've been listening to the wrong Taylor Swift songs
i was still singing "love story"
you were humming "you're not sorry"
i've been listening to the wrong Taylor Swift songs
i thought you belong with me
but you don't need me to breathe

i showed up on a frozen day
tried to give my heart away:
an offer you just couldn't take,
stopped short of saying "it's too late"
i look at all the ones who have
loved and lost, and got it back
but the heart's the greatest mystery:
i can't force you to love me...

you tried to get me to cheer up
said i'd find someone else
but that won't help me, because
you're in a class by yourself...

i've tried to quit it, but it's just not the same
cause i can't support my lips when they aren't speaking your name
and you tried to get me to appreciate what i have
but when i see you, all i can think of is what i lack
cause your eyes are like the stars upon the darkest of nights
and your lips are like a clinic, teaching poetic lines
and your soul is like a spring that i wish i could jump in
and i know this sounds dramatic, but it's genuine...
Track Name: Long Drive Home
In a moment
You'll be home, and
You will enter through the front door
Turn the lights out on the front porch
Turn around and blow a kiss

Not long after
One disaster
Will come and choke out all the laughter
Is there a happy ever after,
Or will I just sing with myself?

If the cold is a metaphor
It's been winter too long
I need summer sun
But you told me twice before
You can handle the snow
But not the absence of hope

In a minute, there's the exit
trade the highway for a runway
if you only you had picked a further point to fly from
then i'd have that much more time
with your hand resting in mine
but that would make for so long a drive home

if the cold is a metaphor, it's been winter too long
I need summer sun
But you told me twice before, you can handle the snow
But not the absence of hope

Wake up, the sun is shining
On every cloud's silver lining
We'll shed our skin and start living
This is just the beginning...
Track Name: I Will Burn San Diego to the Ground
i'm making up a list
of places i will not return
or if i do, they'll burn
it's longer than i expected

driving down the 55;
staying with your friends and mine;
crossing so many state lines;
the riverside and Christmas lights;
the clearest skies and the brightest sun, we found them both
if that had been enough, we'd still be waiting on the coast

you lay next to me in the park
and watched the jets fly overhead
you kissed me in the dark
and then you turned away and wept
you loved me so much right then
the pain was physical
all the space and all the distance
felt like daggers in our souls

i wish that i had realized then
what i discovered when it was far too late
to let my guard down and let you in
you grew weary of the wait

you lay next to me in the park
and watched the jets fly overhead
you kissed me in the dark
and then you turned away and wept
i loved you so much right then
but i did not know what to do
i placed my hand on your porcelain skin
and wished i could seep right through
and be a part of you...

will you open your eyes
and smile at me?
will you open your arms
so i can feel some safety?
will you open your eyes
and laugh at me?
will you open your arms
so i can still make believe?

i know what you're gonna say
when i complete my lines
as long as i keep talking
i've still got time
i know this is over
when i complete my lines
as long as i keep talking
i've still got
Track Name: Dancing in the Dark (bonus track)
you're hiding from me
you don't want to be seen
but i'd give anything
for a new discovery
you're hiding in plain view
but i'm blinded by the news
your hello was unexpected
now i don't know what to do

i'm in the dark
but i'm looking for a spark
for a pulse to stop a heart
and a beat to make it start again

you're smart and you are beautiful
you don't need an excuse
so i can't see what drives you to be
everybody's muse
can't you just be mine?
i swear you're all that i need
come join me in the sunshine
we'll burn up and be free